I have noticed a trend on Facebook where all these women I know say, "I have the best husband in the world!" This makes me wonder.
What did he do? Was it expensive jewelry that caused such a statement? A trip to Jamaica? Or maybe perhaps simply doing the dishes? It does set one to pondering what makes THE BEST husband in the world. By definition, there can only be one best and everyone can't have the best husband in the world. What are her standards? Because, look. I know some of these guys and you couldn't pay me to ride in a car with them, let alone being in a committed relationship with them.
Is he really better than *my* husband, who I think it truly exceptional? My sweet husband who graciously deals with my neuroses and still actually loves my bitching-whining-moaning self? Who will lets me fall asleep at barely 7:45 in the evening (thereby abandoning him to the children at their neediest) after bringing me Tylenol with ice water and filling my humidifier. Who puts lotion on my feet while I whine at him about how he doesn't love me? (Ok, not proud about that.) And is entirely supportive and helpful and hides any resentment that he feels, if he does actually feel resentment? Plus, he does dishes and takes out trash without prompting.
What? You think YOUR husband is better than mine? Well. Frankly, I'm sure you do. While I feel compelled to say "relationships are not in a contest with one another" and "there is no comparing such things, really," arguments spring to my head. Really, a man who is abusive is not as good of a husband as one who is not. But I am sure that somewhere out there, there is someone who would argue with me on that. A husband who has a picture of a bikini clad 18-year-old on his cell phone instead of the beautiful woman he married or their lovely family they made together? Perhaps this is only a demerit to a selection of the population. What about the husband who is never around, but still provides a good life for his family financially? Hallmark tells us he is a worse husband than the husband who is around a lot, but whose family is not as well off. But if taken a step further, is the never-around-rich man a better husband than the always-around-slacker man whose family feels real need?
Anyway, I am just thinking. This is rambling and teetering on judgemental. Unlike my first few years of marriage where I felt my husband walked on water and had no faults to speak of, I can actually name a few now. (Dinner does not always get put away and is occasionally left to rot on the stove. Prompting is usually needed for lawn mowing.) But these are so minimal, really, in my mind. I guess to some people, though, these would be just unforgivable.
It's possible.
4 comments:
I love my husband like crazy, but is he The Best? Ha! No. He could be a million times more patient and a thousand times less self-indulgent. But, he's pleasant to be around, works hard at being successful and is a great father. I won't be kicking him to the curb anytime soon!
We all have our own standards I suppose. I think my husband is pretty great, although he has his faults for sure. Then again, I'm not so perfect either. lol
I try to avoid saying things like that. But I do also try to remind myself, when other people DO say things like that, that what they mean is that they have the best husband in the world FOR THEM. Is he perfect? No. But he might be perfect for them. You know what I mean?
Jess said what I was going to say about husbands being perfect for their specific wives! Brilliant thought, Jess! ;)
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