Kindergarten. It is time to start thinking about Jelly Bean and Kindergarten. (My baybeee...)
The thing is, I am not sure he is ready. He cries a lot. He still has toileting issues occasionally. He takes two hour naps still. His social skills leave a bit to be desired. He hits occasionally (mostly when he is too rambunctious playing.) Basically, the problem is that he is 4 and has his birthday before the cut off sometime in October, but not much before. He would start Kindergarten at 4.
In some ways, I think he could totally do it and succeed. I think academically he could handle the course work. I even think sitting still and paying attention might be ok. Kids are resilient, I tell myself. We are an incredibly adaptable species. He can already do worksheets with ease and pick out all his letters, after all! Right? Right?
I am trying to pick the situation with the least harm. Worst case scenario with both courses of action, which would be worse? Socially ostracised and having no confidence due to failure because he started too early? Or, boredom and under stimulation from starting too late.
My other worries are this: Peanut allergies and having to argue for my kid's safety and basically, not getting all the concessions I want because that is the way life works. And if we do decide to not put him in Kindergarten next year, do we allow him to languish at the sitter? She does projects and works with them every day, but it is just not a classroom setting. Do we try to find a pre-school? (Which, insert allergy issues here, also financial as pre-school is not free.) Do we take both new baby and Jelly out of the sitter? While it may not be my place, I worry about her dependence on us financially. I want to be responsible about that.
Have any of you faced this situation? Tell me, what would you do? What other questions should I be asking myself?
8 comments:
Here, the kids start kindergarten in the calendar year during which they turn four. For fall babies, they start kindergarten when they are still just 3. The purpose of kindergarten is to socialize the children so that by the time they reach grade 1, they know how to play nice, line up and sit quietly.
The allergy issue would worry me, but if it's anything like my kids' school they have dealt with the allergy many times and have a good policy already in place.
I'm the same way with my sitter - I worry about her income and how my decisions will affect her.
Hmm, that is tough, but I do think I would start him. Good luck with your decision!
Here, our cut off date is Aug. 1, so they do not take any kindergarteners who are not already 5 at the start of the school year.
If it were me? I'd wait. But I totally understand it the other way, too. It just sounds like your gut is telling you he'd benefit from more time. I'd go with your gut.
My daughter's birthday is the cutoff date, 9/30. They leave it up to the parent to decide. Although I know she could do it socially/academically/physically (she hasn't napped since she was 2) we are choosing to hold her so she will be the oldest in the class rather than the youngest. I don't want her starting college when she's 17 (gulp!) and I hope the extra year will boost her self confidence. We also decided there was very little that could go wrong by holding her back but many things that could go wrong by sending her early.
It's been a huge issue for us, one that we've talked and talked and talked about. I'm happy to talk about it more if you want. Email me.
Bud's birthday is just after the cutoff here. We could have fought to get him in early, or enrolled him in private school, but decided to wait until he was nearly 6 to send him to Kindergarten. There are pros and cons--he is a very smart boy and could have totally handled the work had he gone early...but emotionally and socially--the better decision for us was to keep him out. So he is the oldest in his class. And it is good. BUT if we'd been in the same position with Lucy, we'd have sent her in a heartbeet. Kids, right?
*heartbeat...GAH
I'm having some of the same worries about E. being ready, personality-wise, but he has a middle-of-winter birthday, so he's going.
K's birthday is Aug. 30th, and the cutoff here is Sept. 30th, but we waited. I don't know what we would have done if she didn't have a food allergy, but she does, and our school had never handled one before. I wanted her to have one more year of dealing with it under her belt, especially since it was all new to her teachers and school administrators.
The peanut issue is SO HARD. The first week of school the teacher brought snacks of peanut butter filled crackers. I was so angry. The schools don't do enough for this allergy. They say when he is in first grade and eating lunch there that he will have to sit at a special table with other peanut allergy kids which REALLY PISSES ME OFF because why make him feel ostracized because of his allergy. They refuse to ban it though. They serve almond butter in the lunch room but won't ban other parents from bringing it which bothers me the most because kids don't wash their hands, what happens when some little asshole kid eats a PB&J and then goes and shares a football with my son. I'm pretty upset about the whole situation. I think this peanut thing is going to give me a panic attack daily for the next 15 years.
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