So. Are we all convinced Facebook is such a brilliant thing? Because, I am not so sure. Maybe all these past relationships should be just left in the past. Maybe we will all be better off if these relationships expired organically and were not artificially resuscitated and left to languish vegetatively on Facebook life support. There was a lot of poking and prodding from my boss and husband that caused me to join. Then it was a lot of hemming and hawing on my part about whether I should have a BLOG Facebook account or an IRL Facebook account. (I chose IRL since my readership is, like, in the single digits.) But really? My reason for joining Facebook?
It was eloquently put by a colleague of mine: I did it to spy on my husband.
True story. Now, while I am liking seeing old friends and playing Wordscraper, there is much squinting at Honey's Facebook Profile and me psychoanalyzing every comment left. I want to send snarky remarks when someone calls him a childish nickname. Sometimes, the Google is involved. And that is all I am going to say about that. Who are these people? How come I don't know any of them? What are all these inside jokes? Are they inside jokes? Gah. I have even gone to the point of counting all his female friends and the lucky bastard has EXACTLY the same amount of male and female friends. (We will go ahead and conveniently forget that the vast majority of his female "friends" are really my friends and relatives. *Ahem*)
Obviously insecurity abounds and is breeding like non-altered bunnies. And perhaps the mental health system needs to be engaged... But really, it makes me kind of sad. There are all these parts of him that I know nothing about. There are all these people and things and experiences that have made him who he is, and I wasn't a part of any of that. And while I talk about what happens in my "online life," he really doesn't. Not that he is being secretive, because he really doesn't talk about anything at great length.
And I know I am the crazy-jealous type. I try and succeed to keep my crazy from oozing all over other people and disrupting lives, including my husband's. I just think that Facebook is giving me a dose of reality when maybe my un-reality was more comfortable. It is providing fodder for my overactive imagination where there was none before; where I could imagine my husband sprang from the earth the moment I met him and that his only past is our past.
8 comments:
Hee! Scott and I joke around about this, too.
I'm not on Facebook. I'm not that social, so I have no desire to check in on anyone from the past and I certainly don't want them checking in on me!
Homer has a checkered past that I would rather know nothing about! He's on FB, but lied about his location (he says he's from California) so the unsavoury folks from his past can't find him. I'm sure their in jail anyway...
"they're" in jail. I'm my own pet peeve.
I LURVE FB, but my husband has a page that he has visited exactly one time. I set it up and he can't even remember the password. He would not care in the least (nor would he even NOTICE) if I deleted his page. Maybe you'd feel better if you went back to the way things were before?
I have to admit to being very addicted to facebook. I have way too many "friends" on it. And my hubby does have a page, and I do look at it once in a while. But I am not really the jealous type so I don't mind. We both have each others passwords so I could snoop if I wanted to and vice versa.
btw, if you wanna friend me ;)
I'm the facebooker- hubby refuses to join -he thinks its a waste of time.
I kinda get the jealousy about your hubby's relationship with others and inside jokes and stuff. It can't be easy to suddenly run into that.
My hus never goes on the computer. If he had female readers, I would be jealous. I try to avoid male blogs too. We do trust each other, I just don't want to cause him any worry. I definately would deny any old boyfriends of mine facebook friendship.
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