I had a huge project to present to a state-wide committee. And when it came time to do the presentation, the technology fell apart right before my very eyes. And since the presentation was actually about said sucky technology, I felt shamed, like I didn't do my homework properly. And I must not have done my homework properly or I would have known that catastrophe was about to ensue. So I was stressed and trying to make it right and feeling all responsible and...stressed.
This is kind of how I am. I get excited really easily. I am kind of high strung. But I would like to change that. Whenever this gets brought up, I am always persuaded to try medication of some sort. But, while I would like to consider myself open minded and say that I would consider medication, (and I really would consider it...before saying NO to drugs. Heh.) I know the answer would always be in the negative.
I would never ever tell anyone else what to do in a situation when they are considering medication for whatever reason, but these are the reasons why I don't think it is something I want to do. (Note: I reserve the right to change my mind at any time provided with new life experiences, knowledge, or situations that require change. Because I am not W, and changing my mind will not kill me.)
- I am lousy at taking pills. I would probably forget my dosage or take too many and then people would be saying, "Is she comatose?" rather than, "Dude, you need to relax."
- Isn't this just life? I have two kids, a husband, a mortgage, a household to maintain, groceries to buy, bills to pay, family relationships to maintain, a full time job, etc. etc. ad infinitum, ad nauseam, forever and ever? My God. Who isn't a little stressed out?
- Maybe this is who I am. I get excited easily. My feelings are valid and do not need to be quelled by sanity in a bottle, says I! So what if I am nuts? So what??? I want things to go well and when they don't, I don't like it. I hate conflict. I can't even stand to watch television characters get publicly humiliated because I am just so so embarrassed for them.
- And if this is just who I am, why not embrace it and not try to drug it away? I don't feel miserable most of the time. Although sometimes I wonder if I will have a coronary by the time I am 35...
- Sometimes I wonder if this is just a social thing. There was an article in Ms. about it. Like women are supposed to have it all, but still act like June Cleaver?
So, in conclusion, I think probably some non-medicinal methods are probably in order. Something to help me chill out that doesn't cost money, doesn't require me to be alone and put more of a burden on Honey, won't require me to quit my job and become destitute (because destitution sounds just sooo relaxing, yes?) and just plain works.
Got a miracle in your pocket for a Stubborn Old Fart?
3 comments:
First off, I am annoyed that you are not even 35.
Second, YES - I think this is life. And some of us - myself included - get more excited than others. I don't think that makes us medicatable (lookie - I think I just made up a new word).
Unless you feel you need medication, or someone close to you who you trust suggests it, I'd be inclined to disregard the 'suggestion'.
BTW - if my presentation had fallen apart in front of everybody, I think I might have had a coronary right then and there (and yeah, I'm ever so slightly over 35!)
Heidi
Aw, sorry for crappy work stuff. Other than wine, I've got no suggestions. (and that's probably not what you were looking for.)
I think you're smart to look at things the way you do (as in, when you're a working mom with lots of responsibilities, there can be stress). My non-medicinal approach to stress relief is walking. Bundle up the kids and head outside for even 20 minutes of fresh air and exercise. It really does wonders for your mental health.
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